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Category: Parent’s Tips

You are called parent, not be a dictator!

It is tempting at times to “lay the law down” and demand your kids “do what they are told.”   To get your child’s ownership on a decision you need to make, you need help them take ownership of the decision.   Allow them to feel that the decision is theirs– even though you clearly know what the outcome must be.  Keep your demands to a minimum.

Engage your child in the process of making good decisions.  Help your child learn how to formulate options and draw reasonable conclusions.  Work together so that the child begins to see how you think. Engagement helps your child begin to understand wise decision making processes.

 

Your mission is to be a vision caster.

What is your vision and dream for your child?  Just like you, your child was born for a purpose. Each of your children are fearfully and wonderfully made.  You as the parent have the responsibility to help your child realize his portent and begin moving toward the vision you have for him.  Without effective parenting, vision is lost and life becomes empty.  You as the parent are to cast a vision for what can be and then help your little one take the needed steps in order to achieve the vision.

 

Parenting is dynamic

Being a parent is dynamic.  What works well today might not work tomorrow.  A good parent is capable of adjusting to change and making adjustments in what is needed in light of new realities.  In order to navigate parenting you need to know your core values–and then stick to those values.

These values must be your compass.  Know if the worldview of your culture is not in line with your values.  Be intentional in instilling what is valued to you in the heart of your child.  Never assume that they will “just get it.” They will not!  You, as the parent, need to teach your child in the way that he or she should go.   Your direct engagement in the child’s life gives comfort and security to your child

“When I was just about your age…”

Telling stories with meaning as a parent are quite easy. You need to OBSERVE, LISTEN, RELATE, RECALL, and CONCLUDE.  Here is what I did as a parent when telling stories to my two girls:

  • Observed what my child was dealing with that day.  This was foundational for using my experience to create a story.
  • Listened to what my child was expressing. My kids told me what they needed to hear.  Yours will, too.
  • Related to my child’s situation by saying, “Once, when I was about your age, I had a similar experience…”.  This began my story from my life.
  • Recalled with details, which helped my story come to life.  Painting a vivid word picture, using mood, colors, time of year, weather, smells, circumstances, other people who were involved, etc. helped make the story real. Details transformed my story into a life-learning adventure.
  • Concluded by summing up what I learned.

Connect the lesson you learned to their experience.   Don’t be surprised if your child says to you a few days later, “Tell me that story again about when you were a kid….”

Turn your Life experience into Adventure Stories!

Your life may seem mundane to you but to your child your life stories can be unforgettable memories for your child.  Your stories can teach and transform the thinking of your child.  Keep the story simple.  Make the situation an adventure. Close the story with a lesson learned.  The Adventures of Andy Ant started as adventures to help my oldest daughter learn a life lesson.  You may not feel you have anything to share but a simple experience can turn into a transforming lesson for your child.